Hi, I’m Sarah Tomchesson.
I am a Certified Sex Educator and pleasure coach, with extensive experience in embodiment, somatics, and queer and kink-affirming modalities. I am the co-host of the feminist podcast F*ck Yeah. I came of age in the queer movement when riot grrls were all the rage and butch/femme dynamics were a reclamation. I have a bachelor’s in theater/literature, which led me to the discovery that taking my clothes off on stage helped me love my body. I am now a parent going through perimenopause alongside a kid going through puberty, which is mostly magical and sometimes maddening. I have always had monogamous tendencies and deprogramming from co-dependent conditioning is “my work”. I am divorced. The process turned me inside out and fundamentally changed how I approach relationships (for the better).
In my “me” time you can find me hiking around California, working out at the Y, cooking for friends and fam, chasing hot springs, soaking at the Korean spa or cuddling our crew of rescues. I am, above all, a wholehearted believer that pleasure is not a luxury. Our magical power is being able to experience joy, sometimes against all odds.
Despite what western culture has tried to drill into us, pleasure is a much needed anecdote to the pressures of modern living. Pleasure can be the ray of light that softens the challenges of life. I got my start in sex ed, so when I’m working with the concept of pleasure I integrate the erotic. But, if the erotic is not your main source of joy or daily satisfaction, you are not alone. For many of us, cultivating simple daily pleasures is a means of self-care, self-preservation and self-intimacy. When you are able to find joy or peace in, say, your morning routine you have a grounding point to work with to expand that pleasure into other areas of your life.
I have spent nearly two decades helping individuals and couples show up as their whole authentic selves in relationships, experience more sexual satisfaction, discover joy in the day-to-day, and connect to their desired feelings through pleasure practices. Helping people reorient towards their needs, their desires, their sensuality, their partner/s, and liberate harmful, shameful or limiting beliefs is what gives me purpose. I pull from my professional, creative and personal practices in my work, integrating traditional coaching tools, facilitation, somatics, sex education, mindfulness, visualization, embodiment and storytelling. I would love to cheer you on, push you gently out of your comfort zone, and guide you on your pleasure journey!
